My A+

The past few weeks have been absolutely hectic! I am a full time student... and I FEEL like a full time student. I have AMAZING news to report though. I aced my class out at Shasta College! Not only did I get an A, I got a 99.37% in the entire class!!! I am so extremely stoked!




I love to strive hard and get good grades. It's pretty important to me, but with everything else going on right now... good grades are definitely not at the top of my list. I've been getting all B's in my classes at National (yes I took classes at National and Shasta at the same time). A couple B+'s but B's all the same. I know that's great... right? I work full time, I'm a single mom, I have a boyfriend who I want to keep around, and I am taking full time classes which I get B's in. It was just really nice to be able to get that A+!!!!

Well.. there is so much going on and I have so much new stuff that I have been learning and I would love to share. Honestly the only reason I have time to blog right now is because my teacher let me out of class early tonight. AND there are other things I want to get done before bed... so for now I will have to save the rest for later.

God is Good

Alright... so God has just been blessing my socks off lately. Yes, there has been some pretty tough stuff that has headed my way. The thing is God has been taking care of me through all of it. It blows me away... all of the little things that he has done for me to help renew my faith in his blessings. God is good all the time and especially in the tough times. So... I am sitting here counting my blessings and it just brings a HUGE smile to my face.

I have really been struggling with my Papa not being around lately. I had some pretty intense dreams with him in them... and it just hurts to not have him here with us anymore. Adjusting to the changes in the family have been hard, but I have a feeling that this next year will be easier for all of us. I know that we will still miss my Papa terribly, but it become easier as we adjust to the idea of it all. Most days it still just feels like it couldn't possibly be true. Honestly, I have been totally freaking out about the holidays... uck... lame... I really just need to place the whole thing in God's hands.

I got to talk to my AMAZING boyfriend Michael tonight. I have sure missed him since he started his new job. Lately though I have realized all of the wonderful things that this has been challenging us with in our relationship. The growth we have experienced already has been mind blowing.

I don't want to blog anymore... so I won't... I have some more school assignments to get done before the weekend. My final is on Saturday and my next class starts on Monday (it's an on campus class so please pray for God to continue to reveal himself to me). I sure need him through all of this. Even now I can feel his Holy Spirit with me... phenomenal peace... ahhhhhh.... God is good.

Education and Restoration

I have decided to write a blog... on what I'm not sure yet... we'll just have to see what happens. I just got done doing some of my homework for my Sociology class. Wow.. so I'm not a huge fan of Sociology... a little bit too much of a liberal socialistic perspective then I care to put up with... we are talking hundreds and hundreds of pages of a perspective that just sounds plain whiny to me.

It did get me thinking tonight about education though. I think that our public educational system is one thing in this country that should be equal across the board... for EVERY child. It's not. Since this doesn't directly effect me (because I live in a school district that has an AMAZING public school system) it is difficult to dwell on this too much. It breaks my heart though that there are so many children that aren't given an equal opportunity because they live in a district that has low funding for their schools. I really hope that one day in America we will wake up and realize how important education is.

So... change of subject... I have been facing some past hurts... still. There are a lot of them I guess. WHATEVER. Anyhow, I am beginning to face up to some issues that are incredibly painful for me... but I am doing it! Be proud of me. Have you ever heard of soul ties? That's the main issue I am facing at the moment. I have connected myself through physical and emotional means to people that God did not want me to and now I have this connection to them. LAME. So.. I gave these random people pieces of my heart and now my heart is left broken and connected to all of these people that it shouldn't be. Which leaves me in a place where I need to claim God's restoration in my life.

AMAZING!!!! =) Restoration is possible and God has a commitment to restore my heart to me so that I can give it back to him. It is really cool (painful and not easy) but incredible all the same. I just wanted to share about that a little bit. I am going to start reading a book to learn a little bit more about it... and I will probably blog a little bit more about it. Because it is so phenomenal and I would love to share it with anyone who has been in my shoes.

Restoration baby!

Tired

Day one of healthy eating and exercise and I already feel absolutely wiped out. This is a really busy school week for me and I am about to the point of tears. I have an essay due tonight and I really don't feel as though it is going to be good enough. I can barely form enough rational thought to have a conversation with my dog--- let alone know if my college level essay flows and has proper punctuation. Just the fact that I am attempting to have a conversation with a dog should be a sign of my imbalance at the moment.

God I need you tonight. I need your strength, help, and guidance. I cannot do this on my own.

Summary

Summarized Update on My Weekend:

- School. Lots and lots of school work.
- Kids. Went to the lake today *woot woot*
- Boyfriend. Michael has been taking care of me, even through my flood of emotions and feelings. (It won't be like this forever)
- Church. Pastor Bill gave an amazing message this morning about how living up to God's law is impossible without grace. (Another reminder that I need to surrender... ok I get it)
- Round Table. Delivers amazing pizza.
- Life. Messy. I trust God to bring me through this. I have denied a lot of things for a long time and I have been trying to work through those painful memories. Most of the time I feel exhausted and want to give up, but I know that I can make it through this. I want to have honest and open relationships and the only way I can do that is by working through this junk.
- Water. Hydration is lovely!!!
- Charlie. Went to the lake today too and needed a shower tonight desperately.
- Music. My boyfriend makes amazing play lists and right now I am enjoying Soaking by Alberto and Kimberly Rivera.
- School. Needs to be mentioned again because it takes up the majority of my free time. I love all of the stories I get to read for my Lit class!!!

Ahhhh yes and now it is time for bed. Well, a nice glass of ice water and bed. Possibly a nice glass of ice water, a trip to the toilet facilities to disspell excess water, and then to bed.

Goodnight.

First Day of School

For the life of me I cannot manage to find my camera ANYWHERE!!! It looks as though it may be about time to get a new one. So, the first day if school was today and the kids and I are WIPED OUT! I decided that at the very least I would have to capture the moment with my web cam, which explains our cheesy grins to the left of me.

Cameran started her very first day of pre-school. I was so excited for her!!! She is very social and I know that she is going to flourish with all of the new challenges that pre-school will bring her. The teacher said that she had an amazing day, but that she didn't eat very much of her lunch. Let's hope that her appetite returns by tomorrow!!

Christian acted like an old pro this morning. I am so proud of my boy. He is in 1st grade this year and already he knows the ropes. He has one of his really good buddies in his class and I am so excited for him to have the opportunity to make even more friends this year! Christian is such a little smarty pants. We started a 1st grade workbook at home and he is just flying through it. It is really going to be a fun year.

I also started school today. I am taking an online class out at Shasta College this semester. I'm only taking one class, because I am actually going to be starting at National University next month. It is thrilling to be on the brink of so much book-smarts... but let me just say that my kiddos and I are exhausted. We are dead tired... and a little bit cranky. It will take a while before we are able to get adjusted to our new schedules, but I know that we will get there.